Stop asking me why I’m vegan. Please, just stop it.

There just isn’t a way to tell someone the reasons why you’re a vegan without sounding like you’re being preachy and superior. Also it draw unnecessary attention and criticism for a simple decision you’ve made about the way you want to eat. I’m already very self-conscious about the way I eat because as a child I was very picky, as everyone takes pleasure in repeatedly reminding me, for example, I didn’t like sauce on my food, and under no circumstances could my baked beans touch the rest of my meal.

Whenever, I tell someone that I’m a vegan, it seems to me that they take this as an insult or a judgement on them. I genuinely don’t judge people on the way they eat, it’s up to them, but my own choices should not be subjected to this level of scrutiny or interpreted as a dig at someone else.

The other day, I started a new job and I was incredibly nervous because it is a job I really care about. Unfortunately  it seemed that my way to deal with my nerves was to repeatedly mention the fact that I am a vegan. I think I said it three times in as many hours. Usually among friends, I make a point of not talking about it, it’s them who usually bring it up. Yet the stress of the new job turned me into some kind of walking advert for veganism. I couldn’t stop talking about it, even to general and polite questions about my lunch plans. Why did this happen? I’m now the crazy, obsessive new vegan girl, who will never shut up about it.

Here is a photo I thought might be appropriate for my new persona

vegan

Maybe it’s because I have been spending a lot of time recently baking vegan food and writing about it, but I just don’t really understand what happened and why? I need new topics of conversation when I’m stressed/nervous, please help.

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13 thoughts on “Stop asking me why I’m vegan. Please, just stop it.

  1. I say more than I would like to when I’m nervous, too. I tend to tell gossip about people that I know they would never possibly meet. I hate that about myself and try to realize I’m doing it in the moment so I can stop and change the subject. It’s difficult for me to be comfortable with silence sometimes, so I just fill the silence with things I wouldn’t normally talk about. I don’t know how to help you- I’m sorry!

    • Yeah, I do that too sometimes, I don’t know why the vegan thing happened, was incredibly frustrating I just couldn’t shut up out of awkwardness. Hopefully, I’ll feel more comfortable next week. No worries, I don’t expect it will change until I get a bit more confident/am more comfortable with silence (which I guess will come from the confidence). Thanks anyway 🙂

  2. I recently became a vegetarian. I told my family over dinner, that I was thinking of becoming a vegan. They all looked at me like I had three heads and needed some extensive explanation for a decision they seemed to think was rash. Oh well, food is a very personal choice. I understand where you’re coming from. I hope it gets better for you!

      • I guess I should prepare myself for that! So far, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, my mom asked “You’ll still eat chicken right? It’s white meat.” I just sighed in response. It was kinda funny that she asked that.

      • I wanted to be a vegetarian as a child, but my whole family are fish mongers, so I was only allowed to be a pescetarian, seems a little harsh to me now. When I went to the West Bank (I was a vegetarian then) they had to keep checking with me exactly what a vegetarian was (i.e. do you eat chicken/cheese/eggs/rice?! etc.) that was fun :p

  3. When you are passionate about something, you talk about it. I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. It usually doesn’t take long for people to find out that I’m vegan. If they decide to project emotion on me (decide that I’m judging them), that’s their problem, not mine. I think that once your coworkers realize that you’re not going to pour fake blood on them or something else crazy like that, they’ll realize that you aren’t judgmental. No need to hide your veganism in fear of making them uncomfortable. It’s just food.

    • True, still feel awkward about it for some reason though. Draws unnecessary attention to me I guess. Just need to get used to talking about food without feeling people are judging me/thinking I’m judging them.

  4. How long have you been vegan? After nearly 10 years of veganism, I find I almost never mention it anymore, infact I have got to the stage where I forget the whole world isn’t vegan and that when other people talk of milk and cheese they don’t mean soy milk and cheezly.
    I think if you are fairly new to veganism it is currently something that defines you so you talk about it a lot and in 5 years you won’t.

    • I’ve been a vegan for a few months now, I think that it’s just that I’m still in the inital stage of having to explain to people exactly what it is that I eat (and that no I don’t just eat vegetables). But it’s good to know that it stops being such a big issue with time.

      • I always say there are only five foods I don’t eat
        meat
        fish
        dairy
        eggs
        honey
        which leaves a lot of food left to eat 🙂
        Of course then people want to get into detail about all the things you don’t do when you’re vegan to wearing leather to having oral sex with animals! (not usually an issue for me, I have to say)

    • Yeah, whenever I tell my family that I don’t eat something, they complain for ages about how picky I am and how I shouldn’t be so fussy… Although I haven’t ever seen them eat vegan food (vegetarian maybe, but there better be a load of cheese otherwise you’re doing something really really wrong). The not wearing leather things I’ve established by talking about my love for cows (they’re so cute). The oral sex thing, really? Did someone actually ask you that?!

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